Lebron James- The Greatest Living Human Being Of His Generation

Lebron James- Super Human

Death by Party | Currently

Lebron James is (currently) the best at what he does.  He’s the Michael Jordan of his generation, the Bird/Magic of your uncle’s generation, the Wilt the Stilt/Bill Russell of your grandparent’s generation, and the inspiration for all children of future generations that try to emulate his style on the playground courts across America.  He’s Abraham Lincoln and Martin Luther King morphed into one, urban God and personal Jesus, street Buddha, corporate hydra, as well as, the greatest show on Earth.  And we can agree that after winning his second straight NBA championship he is sitting on top of the world.

So what does it mean to be the greatest at what you do.  You can quite possibly get away with anything.  Case in point, the Jim Jeffries bit above.  You also get statue’d at some point in (hopefully) your lifetime.  Witnessing the unveiling of a statue in your honor must be quite the trip.  It definitely tops having a sandwich named after you, maybe even having a line of shoes named after you.  If you’re lucky, your name may even become a part of the vernacular.

Great people can take poops on other human beings and not even pay for it!  Just talk to the most unapproachable girl you’ve ever met at a night club and ask her about her recent trip to Dubai.  Better yet, not.  Realizations aren’t worth thwarting broken memories about lost childhoods.  Or the fact that having shit all over newly purchased fake tits represent the acumen of the Arab princes that manipulate the oil industry.  Being the best at what you can do (or inherit) is a sheer representation of the nightmares of those that are lesser than you.  But be assured, Lebron would never poop on an eager-minded gold-digging bitch.  He’d probably just show her how to drive to the hoop or how to reconcile all the choices she has fucked up in life.  Or maybe just show her videos of Mohammed Ali, Evel Knievil, and the Pele in their prime while making this world realize that greatness is nothing but a one way street carved in golden tears.

By Lou Cervantes

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