The Best Worst Most Horrible Epic Duo Ever

Death by Party | Lil’ Debbie & Riff Raff: I honestly have no idea how to wrap my head around this video

I’m kinda freaking out tonight. Here is why.

A while back, two of my most guilty obsessions came together in an unholy union designed by the cosmos to completely fuck up my brain. Hot nerd archetype Lil’ Debbie was kicked out of White Girl Mob because she allegedly ate all of Kreayshawn’s peanut butter. She traveled far and wide to find a home and teamed up with WT ghetto cracker super star and beard sculpture, Riff Raff.

This has been hard for me to handle. I was bordering on obsessed with both of them already.

I’m obsessed with Lil’ Debbie for having that giant beautiful bobble head on a tiny tight little body and for being regularly voted. “most unlikely to be expected to know how to rap” three years in a row. Every time I see her in a video, my mind doesn’t process what is happening. I hear her, I see her, but I can’t put the two together. Then there is Riff Raff. Jesus Christ. Again, I can’t look away. He is utterly engaging like a glob of multi colored Playdoh to someone on acid.

You put them together and it’s like a strange perfect MSG mix. These two together are like peanut butter and Pixie Stix, like 4loco and Slim Jims, like spaghetti on toast…

The ultimate expression of this “WTF is happening” combustion that these two brew is the video above. I know, I’ve watched it over 50 times tonight. Little Debbie trades in her -hipster vintage nerd you spend all night trying to get with- look for straight up hip hop hoe hot pants. The effect is exhilarating. Riff Raff is just Riff Raff. That’s all he needs to be. The song makes no sense, but I don’t care.

“Presidential tint, Michelle Obama
Presidential tint, Michelle Obama
Presidential tint, Michelle Obama
Frozen femurs in the freezer, Jeffrey Dahmer”

I DON’T KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS BUT I THINK IT’S MAKING ME TRIP BALLS AND I CAN’T STOP.

Seriously. Can you call my mom?

By Annette Garcia

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