Power To The Pussy

Fuck Yeah Iggy Azalea

Death by Party | Iggy Azalea- What’s up with the white girl hip hop?

So early on this year I proclaimed 2011 as the year of white boy hip hop. I don’t know about that now. It seems like white girls are far more the cause celeb this year. First you have Kreayshawn and the White Girl Mob. Art school hipster rap chicks from Oakland dropping the N bomb and horrifying old school purists. The rage the White Girl Mob produces is powerfully visceral, but the fact is, they’re really fucking good.

Now along comes Iggy Azalea. Iggy is even more confusing and just as good any member of the White Girl Mob. Unlike Kreashawn’s clear cracker roots, Iggy seems to be trying to fit in with a ghetto fabulous getup, powerful super booty and her obsession with rapping about her pussy. Like the Beastie Boys back in the day,  Kreashawn isn’t claiming street cred, but unlike the the Bestie Boys, she’s catching shit. Like Vanilla Ice, Iggy (originally from AUSTRALIA) appears to be trying hard to fit in, and unlike Vanilla Ice, isn’t catching shit.

The thing is, in the city you do occasionally stumble across a white girl who was legitimately raised in the hood. The current manager of my ghetto Rite Aid comes to mind, a lilly white irish girl with a ponytail on top of her head, a neck tattoo and black lipstick. Last week I watched her jump over the counter and get between a wheelchair bound homeboy and a gang sign flexing Puerto Rican who were arguing about who was “more legit.” She was screaming in her best Jerry Springer awww yeah drawl “I’m the law up in this piece mother fuckers.”

I went in to buy some Draino, and I fell in love. I see her everywhere, the gamblers anonymous meetings, the casino, the dog fights and even in the back alley where I watch hookers huff glue with Wheat Toast.* Now I can’t take my eyes off of her with her big busted nose, thick dose of eyeliner and long gaudy nails. I just want to coo in her ear “you’re more legit than Iggy, wheel chair thug or any set claiming Puerto Rican..”

But I digress. The question I think that is starting to form on everyone’s lips is, does race really matter in hip hop anymore, or have the crackers finally taken it away too?

– Jimi Jam

*Death by Party does not endorse or condone the use of illegal drug use and all references are purely fictional for entertainment purposes.

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