Too Cute

Death by Party | Pickled Punks By Sideshow Gaffs

I have no interest in breeding. Not to be a downer, but when I look around all I see in our future are dead oceans, extreme weather patterns, crushing crowds, corporate owned leaders and Soylent Green on the menu.  I know I’m not alone, it’s why the Video Process was developed.

If you are into the whole baby thing, that’s cool. I don’t mind them around as long as they’re quiet, clean and don’t touch my toys. Like all modern, non-breeding urban DINKs my wife and I happily fill that emotional void with long vacations and aim our paternal urges on our cats, vine plants and growing collection of pickled punks.

The cats aren’t flawless. While they don’t need college tuition and will never steal the car, they still make make some noise, still make some mess and occasionally knock over my toys. The pickled punks however, are completely silent and ARE the  toys I talk about. They are my adorable, silent, lil’ babies who never go through the terrible twos and never scream that they wish they had never been born. Because, of course, they never were.

You can find different pickled punks on Ebay but is the best source for all your well behaved dead mutated baby in a jar needs. With all that money you save in baby cloths, you can afford more than one.

-R.E. Brown

Be sure to check out their site

Tags: , , , , ,

Leave a Reply