All Clowns Have Issues

Death by Party | Embalmo! The Clown

So, our bully-ass bosses told me to watch and then write about this short film called Embalmo! It was produced by Sickening Thud, the production company that filmed the first Video Circus Full-Length Episode. I guess they are trying to decide whether or not the partnership should continue and wanted my opinion about the night we filmed the Video Circus, and what I thought about Embalmo! I don’t really know why they wanted my opinion, they never usually ask. Normally, Black just beats me with a John Holmes dildo while Brown screams “you don’t get any butter, now get in your cage!” until I pee my pants and frap a little. But just to make sure that doesn’t happen, I better say my piece.

I don’t remember shit from the night of the Video Circus taping. I drank half a bottle of Old Crow, topped with percocet floaters*. I remember two girls dressed like secretaries making out in the bathroom while I puked, and I remember this guy screaming at me all night, but most of all I remember Needles Jones’ ball sac. As a cherry on top, I woke up with mustard on my suit jacket. I don’t know what it all means.

Embalmo the Clown

Watching Emalmo! is better that getting beat by a John Holmes Dildo.

I DO however remember watching Embalmo! last night. It had everything I like: gratuitous boob shots, skinny lucha libre wrestlers, animated nightmares, Louise LaTease with her clothes on, a severe clown beating and the devil. I suggest watching this, paired with a sack full of airplane glue and your ass filled with butter. You’ll find that even the worst John Holmes dildo beating will quickly become a distant memory. Rock on Sickening Thud, we could do worse.

Be sure to check out their site

-Uncle Wheat Toast

*Death by Party does not condone or endorse the use of illegal substances and all references are purely fictional for entertainment purposes only.

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