Take Your Meds

Death by Party | Marko Vanhanen /Markorepairs: My VCR Collection

Have you driven by your local landfill lately?  It’s scary when you think about all the toxins that are rising up into our atmosphere.  I’m almost afraid to throw most things away that aren’t perishable.  Even recycling has to have more buckets these days with the amount of objects sentenced to irrelevance.  As technology moves forward more objects need a final resting place.

Sub-Saharan Africa is the popular destination for t-shirts of teams that lose Championship games in major sports.  Everybody knows this is common knowledge.  They also receive any caps and jersey logo malfunctions.  Faulty video games find their way into Vietnamese bazaars to entertain their children.  In fact, most of Southeast Asia is a hot bed for defective or irrelevant toys.  And the ex-Soviet countries seem to be a stomping ground for outdated weapons from a dark period of this planet.

Scandinavia is the capital of obsolete collections.  There is a famous museum in Iceland where a man collects penises in a jar.  The genitalia of both Rasputin and Napoleon are showcased inside this museum.  There’s even a museum nestled in a Nordic forest that claims to have the fossils of infant werewolves and other creatures of contemporary folklore.  Finland plays host to the number one collector of VCR’s in the world, Marko Vanhanen.  While many question the irrelevance of this man’s passion he should be rewarded for it.  His collection should not be looked at as evidence of his insanity but rather as an important asset that provides a graveyard for once popular devices that could otherwise be very harmful to our global environment.  As technology progresses we should only hope that more collectors of obsolete objects like Marko rise throughout our world to display these useless relics.

By Lou Cervantes

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